click image to watch video on IG
Hi! MC Solaris here, paranormal romance author of Calypso’s Heart.
So, in case you don’t know this about me yet, I try and keep it real in all things that I do. And this means me being an open book. (Yeah, I just had to slip in that book pun because duh). Soooo in the spirit of being an open book, I felt called to open up a part of me and share something that feels a bit vulnerable.
Okay, so here it is: Today is one of those days as an author where I’m basically feeling like allllllll the right side of this Tangled meme.
So far, as I write each book, I’ve noticed I experience this crazy emotional writing roller coaster where I basically cycle through this mem many, many times. And oftentimes, I find myself on the right side of the photo during the early stages of writing a new book where it’s a bunch of chaotic scenes and pieces in my head that looks like one of those thousand piece puzzles all spread out over the table. I know all of those pieces fit perfectly together to make up this complete puzzle of some pretty and well thought picture. But at the moment, it’s a thousand pieces of a daunting (and exciting) journey.
And when I find myself on the right side of this photo, those negative thoughts of fear and doubt whisper to me that “I suck” and “I’m not a writer” and “I’m not doing the story or characters justice” and that “I’m effing this up.” And that I should basically quit and let the “real” writers write books.
And I’ve also noticed another layer as I write each book too—the pressure! The pressure to make sure the book is as good or better as the last one. The pressure to make sure to do the story and the characters justice. And again, the pressure to not eff this up to the point where I get angry mail from readers saying how I ruined the story and the characters.
It’s actually kind of paralyzing.
And it’s strange because whenever I used to hear the term “writer's block” I used to think it was because the story dried up. But I think I’m starting to realize the deeper nuances to that term and how the “writers block” that I experience is not because the story dries up—because I can assure you the story is very much there, waiting for me. But rather, it’s because of that pesky combination of fear and doubt. (Again, cue self-limiting thoughts I previously mentioned.)
So, as I’m writing book 4, I feel like the characters and the story are more complex, which to me also means the higher the stakes and the higher the chances there are that again I’ll eff this up and totally crash and burn.
I guess I’m sharing all of this to not only give you authentic behind the scenes glimpses into my newbie author journey but also because I feel like this emotional roller coaster can apply to other things in life too, like pursuing that lifelong dream or even crushing that short term goal. So hopefully in me sharing this today, you’ll know you’re not alone and that I do believe in you.
Yes, I’ll repeat that: I. Believe. In. You.
So, here’s to showing up even when you’re feeling those dips in that roller coaster ride because I believe just as there are the dips there will also be those glorious highs and vibrant feelings that also remind you why you’re doing the thing.
Okay, so that’s it for my random Saturday afternoon ramblings and I’m curious to hear your thoughts on this in the comments and if this resonated with you at all.
PS: now I’m about to head to the beach to watch the sunset and soak in some much needed beach therapy while listening to Calypso’s Heart audiobook. Oh and if you want to get an update on the audiobook release then I’ll be sending an update in my newsletter that’s going out this Monday. So be sure to hop on over to the link in my bio to get the newsletter in your inbox.
M.C. Solaris
❤️Author of massively epic love stories
🧜♀️Creator of emotionally satisfying fantasy escapes
✨Healing thru storytelling
✍️ Channeler of Orion’s Order
https://linktr.ee/mcsolarisauthor